A Little Like Never

by Immediate Family

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Noah McCullough
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Noah McCullough A wonderful creation. Thank you, Brett. I listen to this everyday with purpose Favorite track: Catastrophizing.
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about

..Recorded relatively quickly over the last few months. Some of these songs were written long before 'Watercolor Hangover' and some are quite recent. Since moving to Portland I’ve had to readjust my recording method drastically: I decided to drop most of the live drums because I didn’t have something that could reliably serve as a kick - My cat broke my microphone of five or six years because I’m an irresponsible idiot - I abandoned the piano I’ve been recording on for a decade because it has slowly been falling out of tune (which I don’t understand because it’s electric?) - I started utilizing my keyboard as a MIDI controller, using it to replace the drums and bass guitar I no longer have access to – I tried to back off the Brian Wilson harmonies but (for the most part) failed – Honestly, if you saw the equipment I use to record at any point since I figured out how to, you would laugh: It's embarrassing. I'm poor.

A lot has changed, for sure, but I’m definitely in a better place now than ever before. Writing this depressing shit has actually proven to be quite cathartic.. although difficult at times. I think after this I’m going to abandon the concept album once and for all. Along with that, I plan to tone down the layered recordings and move towards something less complicated. ..Not sure what that’ll look like just yet, but I have a bunch of songs written now that wouldn’t work if I tried to record them the way I recorded this album – and I find that limitation to be refreshing. I'm going to stop talking about what's next now.

Thanks for listening; Much more to come!

credits

released January 19, 2016

Everything recorded slowly by Brett (William) with a budget of $0
Album artwork - Stephanie Senn

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license

all rights reserved

about

Immediate Family Portland, Oregon

Immediate Family is what happens when I (Brett) work on something for so long that I learn to stop worrying and love the process again and again and again and

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Track Name: A Perfect Day to Stay Inside
A perfect day to stay inside -
Until she says that something's wrong and she's right.
A perfect day to wave goodbye -
Until he screams "there's no love lost", but he lies.

How are you not afraid?
How will you stop to notice not the rain?
Miserable holiday; I please you, I'm insane.
Sorry, thank you.

How are you not afraid?
How did you dry the rain?
I couldn't notice not the weight.
Miserable holiday; I please you, I'm to blame.
Sorry, thank you.

She's right.
Track Name: Get Sick
I wouldn't risk minutes apart -
One wish she chased that train to Mars.
Singing: "Take my guns away", I can't complain.
I keep thinking: Take my songs away, set fire to fame.
I gotta get worse. I keep getting worse.

I wouldn't set the strange apart -
One blink she missed the smiling stars.
Singing: "Take my knives away", I'm never safe.
I keep thinking: Take my words away, a lost decade.
I keep getting worse.

Cheers to maybe second best.
Less to lazy, S.O.S.
..I'm sick.
Track Name: Catastrophizing
Get a grip little boy -
You don't have to follow fear to its source.
You don't have to cross that breeze and rejoice.
Hey, what's the point?
Wait, I'm not annoyed.

Dharma, can't we just be drunk? ..Watch the waves resisting?
..Servant striking nervous lightning.
Our arrangement hot, then cold. Brian feels so I think.
..Servant striking nervous lightning - catastrophizing.

Give it up little boy -
You'll accomplish nothing quickly, of course.
..Stupid like the summer you can't enjoy.
Hey, there is no point.
Wait, I'm annoyed.

Daisy, don't despair.
You're crazy too.
Track Name: Big Bunny
Bunny, I feel you - get back into bed.
..Overworked cheapskate dreaming of debt, he says:
"How soon we forget."
Bunny, you bore me - you're barely a friend.
..Autopilot weakness scheming cement instead.
How soon we forget how little we give.

..Wearing out your welcome.
One on one - too personal.
I'm sorry, but you're sick.

Bunny, I feel you - defeated, but trained well enough.
In theory, we're contagiously plain.
How could you complain?
Bunny, I'm watching - you're weak at the knees.
Loaded gun alien playing to please, indeed.
How soon we forget how little we give.

I'm sorry that you're sick.
Track Name: Taurus
I let my strength deceive me - gotta get wasted.
Don't have too many friends now - push me out, pull me to safety.
I could be anyone, but I'm not just anyone.
I'm a sensation crawling across your floor.

I missed the mark completely - gotta get married.
Listless, too bored to leave me - cut me off, pull me in closely.
You could be anyone, but you're not just anyone.
You're a strikebreaker knocking down my door.

..Ten thousand doubts compounded thoughtfully.
Come sound them out - come cast the first stone.

I could've known better - a mastermind misheard.
I could've dug deeper - a witness well deserved.
But it could've hurt less - so I follow you above.
..Self-appointed leader got a face no one could love.

I let my past deceive me - gotta get wasted.
Don't have too many friends now - better stay, gotta stay home.
I could be anyone, but I'm not just anyone.
I'm a teenager burning down your school.

..Discouraged crowd, astounding decency.
Ten thousand proud, distracted easily.
Come bail them out - come cast the first stone.

I could've known better - mastermind misheard.
I could've dug deeper - a witness well deserved.
But it could've hurt less - so, it follows I'm in love.
..Gatekeeper moves me, leader eyes a new scene.
Doesn't matter, I'm in love.
Track Name: Everybody Just Like Me
Didn't mean to be abrupt - I'm too tired to fix this.
Love me like a brother, if you please.
Didn't mean to agree - a recurring comfort lifts me:
Conversation over. Dare I say, love me like a brother?
..If you'd please stand down.

Everybody just like me, satisfied and simple.
..Everybody simple just like me.

Didn't think you could adjust - I'm too high to fix this.
Fear me like the mirror, if you please.
Didn't mean to agree - a recurring nightmare gets me:
Consultation over. Dare I say, fear me like the mirror?
..If you'd please stand down.
Track Name: Mister Conditional
Baby, don't leave me looking lost.
The chemicals mix and melt apart.
So, I said a lot of things - each was less interesting.
..Each a bit more false until it almost meant something.

Baby, don't count the captive stars - too far.
..A passionate need to make love hard.
So, there were a lot of dreams I forget instantly.
..Each distinctly lost when they almost went somewhere.
They almost went somewhere dark - they almost went somewhere..

Back to the kitchen, Mister Conditional.
Lovely lights in the attic - freaking out for fun.
..Bending backwards
There was no answer - I am enamored, Mister Conditional.

Baby, don't leave me looking lost.
The chemicals mix and melt apart.
So, I thought a lot of things - each a forced mystery.
..Each completely false until it almost meant something.
It almost meant something dark - it almost went somewhere..

There is no answer - there was never an answer.
Still, I am enamored, Mister Conditional.
Track Name: Back to Bed
I am a crowded house, but you're bored - filling up fast.
I gave the password up so I'd crash - then I crashed.
Dancing on your grave again; a balancing of acts.
Too easy like a lot of things - a promise not to laugh.
..Crawling back to bed.
Crawling back to basics as if I'd left again.

..Watched the walls begin to move, stared into that vacant blue:
..Looked a little like never.
..Ripped the writing from its womb, saw beyond the empty room:
..Looked a little like never.
You're a little like never too.

I am a last resort, and you're drunk - desperate to dance.
I sympathize unsold for that chance - here's my chance.
Passing out repeatedly; the devil can't contend.
..Locking all the doors as if your ghost could not get in.
..Crawling back to bed.
Crawling back to meet my uncertain end again.
Track Name: Secret Garden
In a secret garden I am missed.
..Done with this face, done with the breath it wastes.
Delivered into debt - disarmed in my place.

In a secret garden I'm convinced.
..One with my weight, one with the work it takes.
The broken boy behaves.
The fire false contained, guess I'll pray?

She absorbs the mood, I remain in tact.
I explain the rules, she's sincerely scratched.
I visualized my certain death.
..Then it almost meant nothing.

In a secret garden I am not.
Time has no stop, life ties an endless knot.
The door that opened shuts.
God explained away, guess I'm stuck?
Track Name: Alaska
Got it all wrong, but I'm feeling alright.
Let me come back to Alaska, I'm fine.

Begin by acknowledging you know who I am.
Perhaps we weren't introduced?
I'm your shadow, you're my proof that the truth don't disappear because you're dead.

Try again - admit that you have nothing left to give.
I'll be watching and waiting and gazing through you.
I'll be praying for something amazing.
I'm committed to keeping you crazy - but what you need is help.
..And I hope that help will find you in time.
But, my friend, I fear it's too late.
You have interfered with your fate.
You have wasted half of your life.